Before
you had kids you probably witnessed an out of
control child having a temper tantrum at the
store. More than likely you thought or said,
"If that was my child, I would ______".
Well now here you are with children of your
own dealing with these exact situations. Temper
tantrums are a normal part of life with toddlers
and preschoolers. Almost all young children
have tantrums occasionally. If handled appropriately,
most children outgrow this stage by four or
five.
Some
children have severe tantrums and may get so
upset that they vomit or hold their breath until
they pass out. Although this can be extremely
upsetting to the parent, the child will generally
recover quickly and completely. If your child
is fainting or vomiting from tantrums, you may
want to consult your pediatrician to check for
any other health concerns.
How
you handle tantrums will have a direct impact
on the frequency and intensity of the tantrums.
Here are some tips on preventing tantrums and
how to respond to them.
Make
sure your child is not over-tired. If she is
cranky or tired put her down for a nap or try
doing some quiet time. You can lay down in the
bed and read a book or play soothing music to
help her relax.
Be
consistent with your rules. If she has a tantrum
and you give in to her demands, she will try
this again. The more consistent you are, the
more she will learn that tantrums don't work.
When
you ask your child to do something, try asking
nicely first. "Mommy needs some help picking
up the toys" usually goes over better than
"get in here and pick up this mess!"
Don't
use bribery. Does she really deserve a cookie
for going to bed on time or not misbehaving
at the grocery store? By doing this you will
only encourage her to break the rules to get
a treat.
Don't
react to her by yelling at her to be quiet.
This will probably only upset her more. Sometimes
in the midst of an outburst it is hard for a
child to regain composure. Help her to calm
down by giving her some quiet time in her room.
Offer her a cup of water to help her relax if
she is hyperventilating.
Sometimes
children have tantrums because they want your
attention. Look at the situation. Have you been
watching tv, reading a book, or talking on the
phone? If your child hasn't had much "mommy
time", she may be trying to tell you something.
Once she has calmed down from her tantrum, try
setting some time aside just for her.
If
you are in a public place, remove the child
from the situation if you can. Go to the car
or the restroom until she calms down.
When
to call the doctor.
If
you are concerned that your child's tantrums
are extreme or more frequent than they should
be, call your pediatrician for help. If your
child injures herself or others, destroys property,
has frequent nightmares, regresses in potty
training, faints, has stomach aches or anxiety
attacks consult your doctor.
Patty
Hone is a wife and mommy to three kids. She
is also co-owner of Justmommies.com. Justmommies
is an online community of moms sharing the joys
and struggles of motherhood. Message boards,
chats, articles, parenting, pregnancy info and
more. http://www.justmommies.com.
email@justmommies.com
