ABC Home Preschool Blog » self confidence

Teaching a Child to Ride a Bike without Training Wheels

TheNanny612 — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 12:33:34 +0000

I remember when I was little and my mom taught me how to ride a bike without
training wheels. Actually, I remember it quite vividly. How can I not? I still
have a few scars on my knees to prove it.

My mom and I out in our back alley of my childhood home. Her running behind
me while holding me up and then all of a sudden I realize she is no longer hold
me up and I immediately panic and fall over.

I remember the fear I felt when I realized she wasn’t holding me up any longer.
I also remember me yelling at my mom in the most dramatic fashion when I blamed
her for me falling and hurting myself. But, what I remember most importantly
is thee feeling of accomplishment when I was able to ride on my own.

I know my mom taught me how to
ride my bike how most parents teach their children how to ride a bike.
My mom didn’t do anything wrong. After all, children learn by trial and
error. From falling I learned how to balance better. I learned what worked
and didn’t work. I learned that I didn’t want to fall anymore…. falling
hurt. But, I kept at it because I wanted so badly to ride my bike on my
own… without training wheels.

I had decided that there must be another way to teach our children how to ride
a bike without training wheels. I understood that my children needed to learn
balance. That in order to learn balance there must be some falling. But, I wanted
to teach my children how to do this with less injuries. And, I did just that.
How? By teaching my children the first few days how to ride bike on the grass.

On the grass? Yep.

Steps I used to Teach my Kids how to Ride Bike without Pain

I didn’t start them too early – They had to understand
a bit of balance. They trained hard on Training wheels for some time. We also
made sure to raise the training wheels every so often as they got use to them.
By the time we removed them from our children’s bikes they were at the highest
level possible and the kids were no longer relying on them for balance as
much.
Started on the Grass - The first few days of training was
spent on the grass. This way they were learn balance, but their falls would
be much less painful… macadam hurts.
Slight Decline on Grass – My background seemed to be the
perfect spot for the kids to learn how to ride bike. There was a very slight
decline in the yard which gave them a little momentum without making them
go to fast.
They Need to Know How to Brake – Before the training wheels
come off the kids need to know how to brake. I practiced a long time with
my children on breaking…. way before the training wheels come off. And,
this is necessary. When the training wheels come off you will find that your
kids will be concentrating so hard on balancing that they will occasionally
forget the things they already learned. You don’t want them to have to worry
about learning balancing and breaking at once.
Don’t expect too much – I went into this event know there
would be some falls, some laughter and probably even some tears. And, that
is exactly what happened. The day will have his challenges, but you will find
more than that there will be ample rewards too.
Celebrate Even the Littlest of Things – This project is
a true challenge for the kids. Not only is it difficult to learn, but it can
be a bit scary for the kids. So, celebrate even the tiniest of advances. If
they stayed up for 20 seconds celebrate it. Be a cheerleader for your child.
Inspect the Bike before Training -Make sure all the bolts
are tightened and the chains are greased. This way the bike rides as smoothly
as possible. Nothing will cause your child to be super scared of riding their
bike than to have them fall due to a bolt coming loose. Do not skip this step!!
Tell them what you are doing through Every Step – I made
sure to tell my children exactly what I was doing every step of the way. Don’t
let go without your child knowing that was going to happen. My mom did that
to me and the minute I saw she wasn’t holding me anymore…. I’d fall due
to panic. Let your child know what you are doing right before you do it.
Reminder Child to Always Look Straight Ahead – This might
seem obvious to us, but to a child it is not. You will find that your child
will be tempted to look at their feet while they are pedaling or to look back
to see if you are still holding them. Constantly remind your child to look
straight ahead. Not only is this important so they don’t hit into anything,
but this will help your child keep the bike balanced as well.
Hold your Child Correctly – When you are holding your child
up and running behind them you will be tempted to hold them on the back of
the seat and handle bars. But, your child will not be able to learn balancing
well this way and it will be impossible for the child to learn how to steer
as well. Make sure to hold your child up by holding the back of the bike seat
and their shoulder or sweatshirt.
Dress your Child Well – Make sure that your child doesn’t
wear anything that you don’t mind getting grass stained or torn. Plus, you
want the less skin showing as possible. Long pant and a Sweat shirt work great.
This way if they fall they will be less apt to get cuts and scrapes and be
frightened to get back on.

Also, if you do not have a nice area of grass suitable for teaching your child
to ride a bike and must do it on macadam please make sure to have elbow and
knee pads. Plus, it is imperative that you don’t skip out on the helmet even
if you are riding on the grass. Any fall can cause head injury without the proper
protective gear.

Preparing Your Child To Start Preschool

TheNanny612 — Tue, 28 Aug 2007 02:32:42 +0000

No parent is ever
ready for the day that their child goes off to preschool. But
that doesn’t mean that your preschooler can’t be ready. Even if
you’re nervous about the separation, you should do your best to make sure
that your child is prepared to head off to preschool when the time is right.
You want to do well as a parent and part of this means giving your child the
tools to go off on his own, even if it’s just for a few hours at preschool.
And by preparing your child both educationally and emotionally for the preschool
experience, you’ll help to quell your own fears about the situation.

Here are
some of the things that you need to do when preparing your child to start preschool:

Get
your child used to following directions by using them regularly in your
home.
Use simple one-step directions first (such as “brush your teeth”).
Then incorporate a second step (such as “brush your teeth and
then get in bed”). Over time, your preschooler will get used to
following directions and this will make doing so in preschool easier.
Involve
your child in a play group or other social activity.
Your preschooler is going to need to learn to share items, take turns
and otherwise interact with children so make sure that you’ve
given him the skills to do so.

Know
where your child should be academically. Your preschooler doesn’t
have to be right on track or ahead of the game, but you should have some basic
child development knowledge of where other kids of the same age are going
to be. This varies depending on the age that your child enters preschool but
can be figured out by checking out basic parenting books on development. Help
your child reach an average academic place before sending him off to preschool
so that he doesn’t start at a disadvantage.
Point out the
ways in which your child is growing up and make it a point to say
that preschool is a big kid thing. This way, your child will be proud
and excited about preschool, not scared.
Purchase
some special preschool items that your child gets to use only when going to
preschool.
A backpack, lunchbox, set of crayons … these small things that are for
school only can help with the transition to preschool.
Use a
schedule at home since your child will be on a schedule in preschool.
Have a playtime, a nap time, a video time, and an outside time that are basically
the same every day. The routine itself may be different in preschool but the
process of getting used to a routine won’t be new.

And of course, the
most important thing about preparing your child to start preschool is that you
have to prepare yourself. Even parents who are eager to return to work
feel a twinge of regret when it’s time to send kids to preschool. It’s
a change that breeds fear. But if you are overly anxious about it, your child
will pick up on that and the transition to preschool will be more difficult.
Trust that you’ve prepared your child for preschool and rest easy in that
knowledge.

Technorati Tags:preschool, pre-k, kids, children, education, learning

Playgroups

TheNanny612 — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 01:10:56 +0000

What are playgroups
and why are they good for you and your kids? Well, although there are many different
kinds of playgroups (from the formal which includes themes and scheduled activities
to the information that just gathers together), they are all basically the same
thing: a group of children and their parents who get together on a regular basis.
That’s it. It doesn’t have to be anything fancier than that, just
an agreement between a group that you’re all going to get together regularly
so your kids can enjoy playtime together.

And
why are playgroups considered a great thing by many parents and even professionals?
Well, there are numerous benefits to playgroups, starting with the fact
that they give everyone in the group a little bit of a break from the
busy activity of life. Sure, you have to get yourself and the kids there
but once you do, you really just get to relax. Playgroups are a time designated
for being social, catching up with other parents and watching your kids
have a good time. You don’t have to be an expert to see the benefits
of that!

But, experts in
child development do tend to agree that playgroups have numerous other benefits
for kids. At the core, they assist children in developing the social skills
that they will need throughout the rest of their lives. Kids who are in playgroups
that meet consistently become familiar with the group and therefore comfortable
there. In this comfortable environment, they can stretch their wings, learning
different ways of interacting with others in the group. And this consistent
group can also give them a sense of community which helps children to better
develop in areas like self-esteem.

The playgroup is
good for parents, too. Not only does it give you a break from your busy day
in which you get to just relax and chat with other adults, but it also acts
as a great resource. Parents who spend time with other parents have access to
information about current health trends, local schools and the best area babysitters.
They also have a support network when things go wrong and a group to celebrate
with when life is good. These people differ from your friends who may come from
all walks of life in that they are specifically committed to you as a parent
and to the well being of your children.

Having a playgroup
also serves a purpose that benefits both the parent and the child, and that
is that the parent knows the other people in the playgroup. Obviously, it’s
important to know who your kids friends are and who they spend time with. The
playgroup facilitates this. As your kids get older and move on to making their
own friends in school, they may be able to make better choices because of the
groundwork that was laid for them in the playgroup. And the parent will know
what’s going on in the lives of their children during these important
young years.

So, playgroups serve
all kinds of different purposes. They can be structured in different ways and
may be made up of a variety of different families. But ultimately, what they
do is create a small sense of community in which you and your child can both
thrive. In this busy age, when communication is often limited to emails and
voice messages, it’s a relief to have a place like a playgroup where you
and your child can go to get that old-fashioned sense of community.

Technorati Tags:playgroups, children, kids, parents, social skills

Arts & Crafts for Kids – Why is art important for Preschoolers

TheNanny612 — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 06:30:11 +0000

You know that arts
and crafts are great for your kids. After all, they keep them entertained and
occupied, sometimes for hours at a time despite their typically short attention
spans. And they give you a focused activity that you can enjoy which frequently
results in a product that you and your child can both be proud of. But did you
know that arts and crafts aren’t just great distractions for your kids;
art is actually very important to the healthy development of children who are
preschool age.

One
of the biggest reasons that art is important for your preschooler is that
it assists in the building of healthy self-esteem. In the early preschool
years, your child is in a stage of psychological development that focuses
greatly on learning to take pride in him or her self. This means that
it’s a critical time for development of self-esteem by doing things
that he or she can be proud of. When your preschooler is engaged in a
focused art activity which he or she completes, resulting in a product
that you express pride in (the picture that you hang on the refrigerator,
the cardboard sculpture that you display on your coffee table), you’re
setting the foundation of your child’s good self-esteem.

But the result
isn’t all that’s important, meaning that it’s not just
the creation of art projects that matters. The entire process of creating
art is important because it stimulates the creativity and encourages imagination
in a way that will influence your child for the rest of his or her life.
So, some of the art that your preschooler enjoys should be creative art
that doesn’t necessarily result in a lasting product. Playing with
clay is one example of this type of art. When you support this kind of
art for your preschooler, you teach him or her about the joy of simply
playing with imagination and enjoying the act of creation.

In addition
to the psycho-social benefits of art, art is important for preschoolers
because it assists in building important motor skills and improves overall
learning. Art activities like cutting with kid scissors and learning to
control crayons all assist in improving your preschooler’s motor
skills. In addition to this, children have different learning style and
art allows them to explore those different styles. If you pay attention,
you might find that your child is more of a visual learner (focusing on
image-based art when given free choice) or more of a kinesthetic learner
(using tactile art like playing with clay). This knowledge will help you
to help him or her with subjects in the future and playing with art will
help develop the learning areas that your preschooler might be naturally
less inclined towards.

So, yes, art
is great for your kids simply because it’s a fun way to pass the time.
But engaging in regular arts and crafts is something that is good for preschoolers
on many other levels as well. Don’t over think it – you don’t
want to take the joy out of it, after all. But recognize the importance
of it and support art in your child’s life as much as you possibly
can. You’ll be rewarded with small art projects along the way and
a lifetime of joy with your creative child.

Technorati Tags: kids+crafts, arts+crafts, child, kids, children, preschool, education, parenting

Teaching Your Child to Deal with a Bully

TheNanny612 — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 16:12:41 +0000

You feel like your
worst nightmare has come to pass. Another child in your preschooler’s
life has started to bully him or her and you’re not sure what to do about
it. On the one hand, you want to teach your child to stick up for himself and
to handle things alone. On the other, you want to intervene and stop the bullying
before it gets out of hand. You have no idea what to do. And the worst part
is that the situation brings out all of your feelings of helplessness as you
begin to realize that you are not going to be able to protect your child from
the world.

Relax. This
isn’t your worst nightmare. And although it’s a difficult
situation which must be dealt with carefully, it’s certainly one
that you’re capable of managing. It’s true that you can’t
protect your kids from the horrors of the world, but you can use every
opportunity as a learning example for giving your child the skills necessary
to deal with the difficult situations that the world will bring to you.
And teaching your child how to deal with bullies is one step in that learning
process.

The
Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander: From Preschool to High School–How
Parents and Teachers Can Help Break the Cycle of Violence

The first
thing that you need to do is get your own feelings of helplessness under
control. Parents often feel an immediate protective urge towards children
who are bullying their kids and this can sometimes lead to negative situations
in which parents react poorly to the bullies. Since you are obviously
bigger and older than the child bully, you actually perpetuate the problem
if you handle it poorly because your child sees that the bigger, stronger,
older person wins. Instead, take a moment to relax and handle the situation
appropriately. Remember that the child bully probably has a reason that
he or she needs to assert such power over your child and remember that
you’re the adult and these are the children.

Be supportive
of your child and help to give your child a sense of empowerment so that
he or she can deal with the bully. This means talking with your child
about the situation, encouraging him or her to come up with some solutions
to the problem and discussing appropriate ways to handle the situation.
Simply having an open, loving and safe environment in which to solve the
problem can help your child immensely in dealing with the bully. Consider
reasonable solutions to the problem and teach your child how to enact
those solutions. For example, verbally confronting the bully is one option.
Teach your child to appropriately say, with confidence, “you may
not treat me this way”.

If your child
can not cope with the bullying on his or her own after strategizing and
working to solve the problem, you may need to intervene. This is particularly
true if your child is being physically harmed or is too frightened to
attend preschool or otherwise engage in normal social activities. It is
best if your child can deal with the bully alone, but if that’s
not possible, you must protect your child. Doing so means handling the
situation appropriately in a manner which doesn’t diminish your
child’s abilities to handle the situation. Having your child discuss
the situation with a teacher at the preschool or another authority figure
in a position to help can get the trouble under control while still allowing
your child to exercise some power in the situation.

Remember that
the best attack against bullying is to teach your child preventative measures
from an early age. Help your child to develop self-esteem so that he or
she does not allow him (or her) self to be bullied. Also teach your child
to handle problems (such as issues in sharing with other kids) on his
or her own with appropriate behavior. And always create an environment
in which your child feels safe to come discuss the problems that he or
she may be having with others and to problem solve about them with you.

Taking
the Bully by the Horns – Children’s Version of the Best Selling Book,
"Nasty People"

Technorati Tags: bully,
child+bully,
bullies, kids,
children, family,
parenting,
school, preschool,
neighbors,
self, confidence

Chores For Preschool Kids

TheNanny612 — Sat, 23 Jun 2007 01:52:28 +0000

Should your preschooler be required to do chores? At what age are chores appropriate for your kids? And
how do you go about delegating chores to your preschooler? These are all questions
that parents often face as they try to teach their kids about responsibility
in the home. Parents should know that dealing with these questions is something
that other parents are going through as well and that you’ll find the
right answers for your family.

Here are some of the basic
things to know for getting preschool kids started on chores:

Chores
help your child to develop a sense of responsibility but also have
other important functions. They increase a child’s self-esteem
because he or she is rewarded by a job well done. Chores also help
the child to feel like a participating member of the family.
Children
are developmentally ready to handle small chores around the house
starting around the age of two.

You should
start
with asking your child to do only one daily chore. Allow him or her
to master that chore before adding additional chores. For example,
you may want to start with having your preschooler pick up his or
her own toys. If it is the child’s chore to pick up the toys
before bed, then this skill can be done daily and mastered before
a new chore is added to the routine.
Let your
child pick new daily chores as time goes on. You can have an activity
with your preschooler in which you work together to identify the chores
that he or she can do. These may include laying out clothes for the
next day, picking up toys, stacking books in the family room, helping
with pets, wiping down tables or other small age-appropriate chores.
Letting your child choose form a list will help your preschooler to
feel like the chores are part of being in the family.
Have
realistic expectations about what chores your preschooler can do.
Remember that he or she needs to have specific instructions and may
need reminders. Also, know that your preschooler isn’t going
to do the job as well as you are; that’s not the point. The
point is for your preschooler to do the job to the best of his or
her ability.
Use a
reward system. Children are more interested in doing chores when they
can see their accomplishments. Having a chart with stickers marking
completed chores can make the daily chores a fun thing to do.
Use a
step-by-step chart for detailed chores. As your child adds new chores
and gets into the older preschool years and has the ability to do
more complicated chores, a step-by-step chart showing what needs to
be done can help your child with chores. The child can look at a pictorial
step-by-step chart to figure out what to do without your assistance,
making him or her feel more important and self-reliant.

When chores
are introduced in the early years, using a positive reinforcement or reward
system and are considered to be part of what your family does together as
a family unit, your child develops a healthy attitude towards doing chores
and helping around the house. How you do this will differ depending on your
family’s needs but know that preschool chores are certainly a positive
part of your child’s development of both self and sense of responsibility.

Technorati Tags: chores, household+chores, kids, children, family, parenting, age, child, development, toddler, preschooler

Understanding Your Preschooler’s Imaginary Friends

TheNanny612 — Wed, 20 Jun 2007 03:02:36 +0000

We are always wondering if
our children are “normal”. We don’t mean to do it, but nevertheless,
it’s something that we do all of the time. From the time that we first
count those ten toes and ten fingers, we’re subconsciously (or consciously)
comparing our kids to some ideal standard of what is “normal” and
wondering how they measure up. And when it comes to areas of life that aren’t
so easy to understand, we often have trouble figuring out what’s “normal”
and how to deal with it. Often, this is the case when it comes to imaginary
friends.

We wonder if it is “normal”
for our kids to have imaginary friends. Of course it is. But at what age does
it stop being normal? Or what behaviors in interacting with these imaginary
friends are not normal? We worry, because we want our kids to have a healthy
level of social and emotional development. Here are some things to think about
which can help you alleviate those concerns:

It is
absolutely “normal”
(meaning common) for children to have imaginary friends.
Imaginary
friends
usually turn up in a child’s life during the preschool years and often
fade out of the child’s life during elementary school.
Imaginary
friends
are more common among first born children and only children and may reflect
the child’s desire to have increased interaction with other children.
Preschool groups can assist with this.
Imaginary
friends represent the creative side of your child’s brain so
you should never discourage your child from healthy exploration of this part
of life.
Children
often keep their imaginary friends to themselves. While it’s appropriate
to ask questions about the imaginary friend to ascertain what your child believes
about the situation, you shouldn’t pretend to interact or play with
your child’s imaginary friends unless your child invites you to do so.

If you’re still having
concerns that your child’s experience with an imaginary friend isn’t
normal, here are some warning signs for negative play with imaginary friends.

Your
child
regularly refuses to play with other children and only wants to play with
the imaginary friend.
Your
child’s
imaginary friends linger into the older elementary school years.
The imaginary
friend
is introduced into play with other friends who make fun of your child.
Your
child
acts out behavior with the imaginary friend which is violent, sexual in nature
or otherwise indicative of an underlying problem. In this case, your child
may be using the imaginary friend to try to tell you something that he or
she can’t tell you alone.

As a general rule, it’s
perfectly “normal” for your preschooler to have imaginary friends.
They help your child exercise his or her imagination and provide additional
stimulation during playtime. And of course, all children develop differently
so your child’s interaction and length of time spent with the imaginary
friend may vary from that of other children of the same age. As long as you
don’t see any of the above warnings signs, you can probably assume that
the imaginary friends are a fun phase that your child will pass as he or she
begins to enter elementary school age.

Technorati Tags: imaginary+friends, kids, child, children, parenting, behavior+issues, social+skills, normal+behavior

Defining a Good Mom

TheNanny612 — Wed, 13 Jun 2007 03:54:55 +0000

Check out this excellent
post about what makes for a “Good Mom”. I had to share it with my viewers.

A good mom talks to her
child. Hearing words and conversations is one of the biggest ways to impact
a child’s ability to learn. The more words they hear when they are infants,
the more words they will come to understand when they are toddlers and pre-schoolers…

read more | digg story
Technorati Tags: parenting, child, kids, mom, mother, parenting+skills, parent

Building Self Confidence in your Child

TheNanny612 — Wed, 13 Jun 2007 02:55:08 +0000

Children who truly believe
that they can do anything they set their minds to are the children who grow
up to succeed at all levels of life. It’s that belief in one’s self
that lets them take appropriate risks, deal with challenges and learn to navigate
the ins and outs of life. And there is no person in the world who can build
that self confidence (or destroy it) like you can. If you want to have a child
who does well in life (and what parent doesn’t right?), then you need
to watch your own behavior and interaction with your child, making sure to maximize
his or her self-confidence in every way that you can.

Here are some things that
you should think about regarding self confidence and your kids:

Don’t
do things for your child that he or she can do alone. Children
need to learn to take care of themselves and they learn this through hands-on
experience. By knowing appropriate developmental stages as well as where your
child is at, you can identify which tasks he or she can safely do without
your help. Your preschooler may not like picking up after himself, but if
he can do it, he should. In the end, this will help build self-confidence.
Give
your child choices. Being able to make decisions is something that
your child will have to do all throughout life. Starting young with learning
decision making skills will give your child confidence in her ability to make
her own choices as she gets older. When peer pressure starts coming into the
picture, you’ll be glad that you worked on this part.
Be proud
of your kids and show that pride. Sometimes it’s easy to compare
your children to others, to yourself or even to some ideal child that you
have in mind. Don’t. Be proud of who your child is and where he is at
developmentally and express that pride. Knowing that you’re proud will
be the springboard that lets your child dive into deeper waters over time.
Be quick
with praise, slow with criticism. Your child needs to know when he’s
done a good job at something. Don’t ever take anything for granted in
terms of noticing your child’s skills and positive behaviors. On the
other hand, be slow to criticize. While constructive criticism is good, constant
criticism is not. Only criticize your child about things which are truly important
and do so in a way that corrects the act without attacking your child.
Apologize
when you are wrong. Learning that it’s okay to be wrong and
seeing that it’s okay to apologize for bad behavior are important steps
towards developing self confidence. Your child learns that she doesn’t
have to be ashamed of making mistakes and that she can own up to them and
move on, hallmarks of a successful human being.

Self confidence is something
that we all need and sometimes which most of us struggle with at times. It’s
hard to know that you’re right, to be secure in all of your choices, to
feel that you are capable of taking risks and making them work out in your favor.
But the people who are able to overcome their insecurities and to use their
inner self confidence to get to where they want to be in life are the people
who are both happy and successful. That is surely the life that you want for
your child, so praise her and be proud of her and help her to develop that inner
voice that tells her that she is worth something in this world.

Technorati Tags: child, children, education, family, kids, parenting, preschool, raising-kids, self-confidence, self-esteem, social-skills