We all lead busy lives. Even those of us who try to simplify often have
more multi-tasking going on than we would like to admit. We’re always
only half-listening to the stories that our kids tell us while we’re
simultaneously checking email, scheduling appointments, planning our next
kids’ party or taking care of daily chores. Often, we barely see
our spouse in passing as we hand off the kids to get a little adult alone
time – even if it’s just a quick bath. It often feels like
a necessary situation to getting everything taken care of that needs to
be done on any given day.
But what really
matters more; that the laundry all got done and folded or that you got to spend
some time with the people that you love? Making time for your family is not
only possible, it’s necessary. And it doesn’t take another twenty
four hours in the day to manage it. It just takes a little bit of organization,
a willingness to let a few things go sometimes in order to be with your family
and the will to make it work.
Here are some ideas
for making time for your family which you might find helpful if you’re
starting to feel like you never really hear your kids and never really see your
spouse:
- Make
family time a priority. You aren’t going to be able to
get everything done all of the time and still spend quality time with
your family. Sometimes, your email won’t get answered, your floor
won’t get vacuumed and your car won’t get washed. It’s
okay. The reality is that it’s not going to matter if you sleep
on sheets that should’ve been washed yesterday or the cat has
to eat tuna today because you didn’t make it to the pet food store.
But it does matter if your kids feel like you’re always taking
care of the house and never taking care of them. - Designate
an actual family time. Traditionally, dinner time used to be
family time. But that doesn’t work for all family these days when
hours in the office run late and kids have activities several nights
a week. That’s okay. But your family needs to have some sort of
time, every single day, that is family time. Figure out what works for
you. It might be just the twenty minutes before everyone goes to bed.
Or maybe you can get the family up half an hour early to spend the morning
hours together. Whatever works for your family works. Just plan it and
always spend that time just having quality time with your family.
- Plan
special time with certain family members. Maybe the girls in
the family will have a girls night’ out while the boys stay home
and eat pizza with Dad. Or perhaps Mom and son will have a monthly movie
night and Dad and daughter do the same on a different day. It’s
often easier to coordinate schedules with less people so make some bigger
chunks of family time go more smoothly this way. - Take
a “well” day. Rather than a sick day, take a “well”
day now and then. Parents don’t go to work (or stop work from
home for the day), kids don’t go to school and activities and
you all just enjoy a day of being home together. Just like on days when
you’re sick, you can all cuddle up under blankets and watch a
movie together, eat chicken soup and do a lot of nothing.
- Make
five minutes special. Everyone can spare five minutes. Make
yours worth more by having a special ritual that’s just for your
family. For example, do a “five favorite things in five minutes”
each day in which the family has five minutes to come up with a list
together of their five favorite things that happened during the day.
Little games and moments like these bond families and create quality
time even when there’s not a lot of quantity time to give.
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